Puhleeeeeeeze -- Thoughts On Divorce

While surfing through Blogmad, I came across a site called Journey Through Divorce. I've been divorced for 11 years, but I still stop to read or listen to what people have to say about the process. I find their thoughts fascinating and usually meandering so far in the outfield, the fans have long since gone home, the lights are turned out, and "The Party's Over" has been playing on the loudspeaker for a good 2 hours.

I have never been happier since I left old Fuzzlenuts after 30 long, tedious, abusive, mind-numbingly stupid years. I cannot completely regret those 30 years because I have a daughter who would not be here (a thought I cannot begin to grasp) if it weren't for the marriage. No, instead I prefer to think of those 30 years as a sentence, and it seems to me it was an unfair one. People who commit murder serve less time in lock-up than I served being married to Fuzzlenuts. But I did my time, paid my debt to whomever wanted to collect, and then I had enough. So I consulted an attorney, agreed to whatever it took to get free of WhatsHisName, and moved on to being happy. Yes, happy. No, wait... ecstatic is more like it. I have never regretted for one single second leaving behind everything that made me miserable for so long.

So when I read bullshit like this:

"But you know deep down that you can’t be happy alone. Your life is meant to be part of another life."

it makes me want to hurl chunks.

Who in the blue hell decided that every person on this earth was destined to be or meant to be part of another life? I mean has anyone ever considered the question, "What if he or she is not meant to be part of a duo, and what if that person not only can but WILL be happy alone?

This bill of goods has been sold from generation to generation, and it's only the current crop of 30-somethings who seem to have gotten smart and realized that it really can be better to choose to be alone rather than sell your soul and be with someone with whom you're unhappy. You don't have to settle. You can maintain higher standards for yourself -- a life where you choose what's best for you and do not hand over the reins of your life for a partner to shoot all to hell if he or she chooses. You think you so intimately know the person with whom you've decided to spend your life? ROTFLMAO!!! Yeah, right. Talk to Ann Rule about that premise. Better yet, sit at work and just listen to your co-workers talk about their marriages. It ain't pretty, but if you truly listen for a while you may begin to get the idea that people do not marry for love and happiness and 'til death do us part. They marry for convenience or because they don't want to be solely responsible for their entire lives until the Grim Reaper shows up and shuts down the power source. It's called being realistic. And for those who want to settle for whatever crumbs of satisfaction they can glean from a match that's proving to be made at the portal to the 10th level of hell, that's fine. But it doesn't have to be acceptable to everyone, and if you choose to want better, that doesn't mean there's something wrong with you because you've chosen to like your own company better than some astonishingly boring or obnoxious numbnuts.